Yeah, here comes Supergirl...

I have been asked by several people, including "my girls" at church, to post about my views on...dating. Alright. Since you asked, I'll attempt to put it into words.
People who do not know me very well...and even some who do...assume at times that I am either a)bitter due to a past relationship or b) uninterested in a relationship. Neither are true, but my actions (not dating and not approving of a lot of relationships I see) and words (encouraging the girls I know in my "ways") certainly voice my disapproval. What exactly do I disapprove of?
Excellent question. I disapprove of the way our culture encourages young people, both male and female, to engage in relationships that are often unhealthy.
I grieve when I see teenagers, especially girls I know, who, are 1) convinced that their worth is connected to having a dating relationship, 2) In an unhealthy relationship because they think "it's just what they should do", and 3) So distracted by their pursuit of a relationship that they cannot focus on more important things...such as their relationship with God or their family.
Instead, they should know that their worth is in their being a beloved, highly treasured, talented child of God, not conforming to the patterns of this world but seeking to follow a wonderful plan for their lives, and forming mutually encouraging relationships with their family and other friends, and finding the true source of love, because "This is love: not that we loved God, but that He loved us, and sent His son to be the payment for our sins."
I also disapprove of teenage relationships because I've been through one. I didn't do anything I regret, but due to immaturity and hormones, it would have been very easy to make some. It is also not usually possible for a serious (as in leading to marriage) relationship to develop. It really is a waste of both peoples' time and emotions.
Since in my experience as a teenager and in working with teenagers for the past 3 years, I see that it is virtually impossible (though perhaps not entirely, i personally know one exception), for a teenager to focus on what is important and live a life of maturity and purity while dating and accepting our culture's view of dating, I suggest avoiding dating until a person is fully developed in maturity.
I realize that these are very strong views, and many people do disagree and are often offended. But since our culture is so focused on value in a romantic relationship, and often the physical aspect of that relationship, I truly see waiting as the best solution. I've been waiting for a long time, and I plan to continue to do so. I truly believe that is my calling for now, (and besides, what would "my girls" do without me standing strong?:-) But seriously, I want to be able to have pure, encouraging, and meaningful relationships with men, and if (hopefully!) i do marry one day, I want to be able to give my husband my whole heart, without regrets or unwanted baggage. That's what I want for you, too, both guys and girls: don't waste yours or others emotions or time, seek God above all else, do not be conformed, and live with no regrets.

The untold saga of the superheroines

Once upon a time, Wonder Woman left Amazonia and came to a strange world. Among her many adventures, she endeavoured to inspire the young women of this strange place to follow a higher calling than the one their world placed upon them. One of these young ladies, who had always thought there was something better than this strange place, was enchanted by Wonder Woman's tales of adventure as she followed this different path. The young lady had many struggles of her own during the next few years, but due in a large part to Wonder Woman's example and encouragement, she managed to learn the code of the superheroes, though she was not yet one herself. Wonder Woman was kind enough to take the young lady as her protege, and though they carried on their own lives, they kept in constant contact. The young lady stayed in the strange place as Wonder Woman moved on, and continued to encourage the other young women. Though it was a challenge, she knew she could always call on Wonder Woman for advice and friendship. Then one day, everything changed.
Wonder Woman met Batman.

We all know what happens next...Wonder Woman again follows the higher calling and becomes the sidekick..Batgirl.

Who, of course, is still as amazing as ever. In fact, she had even greater adventures now that she had someone to share her victories with. And Batman was not as solemn as he once was. And we like him better that way.

But Wonder Woman/Batgirl knew it was time for her protege to take up the Lasso of Truth. Yet the young friend knew she could never do it. How could she possibly become Wonder Woman? She thought of all the times she'd failed when she was sure Wonder Woman would have saved the day...of all the times she had lived in Wonder Woman's shadow...and had not met the expectations.
She felt more like this:

Instead of the great superheroine she so admired.

It was a hard burden for the young protege. She went to the great Code Writer, whom she had known since childhood, and who Wonder Woman had encouraged her to grow closer to, and asked Him how she was ever to become Wonder Woman. She did not expect the answer He wrote in her heart.
She could never be Wonder Woman. She was not meant to be. Ah, she understood that her mentor did not mean her to be either...but to be who the Code Writer had destined her to become.
So the young protege gladly took up the Lasso of Truth...it's nice to know the bad guys aren't lying and can't escape...but also took up a new identity.
She became Supergirl. And it's not as though Batgirl and Supergirl can't have their adventures together.
In fact, they're going to save Boston with the help of a super Aussie chick this fall.
Supergirl and Batgirl will always be close.

And Supergirl is so definitely ready to save the world.

The Hidden Poet

I allow the pensive bard in me to express itself on occasion. Here's a sample of my rather limited collection of original poems.
First, some clarification to this poem.
Light:1)n."That which makes things visible".
2)v. "come to rest"
3)v. "attack" (Lord, destroy our sin and selfishness!)
4)n. "clarification" (Show us what we are..but even better, who you are)
5)adj. "easy to bear" (I John 5:3 "His love is not burdensome")

Light of Love
Never fades
Never fails
Ever shines
Must prevail
Shoulders wind
Forgets rain
Despite all
Shall remain
Light and Love
Both from The(e),
Only Source
Oh Father
Of all Lights
Holy Love,
Light on us!

Woman vs. machine

Take one malfunctioning cappuccino machine.


Add one charming ex-barista.

Result? A two-hour duel...woman vs. machine.

She cleaned it again. It did not explode. She takes off all the little pieces and gadgets, cleans those. Puts it back together. Adds the perfect amount of water and expresso. Will the machine give? Ah, the sweet aroma of espresso fills the kitchen. But the machine has a trick up it's...sleeve...
It adamantly refuses to froth the milk.
The woman is now desperate for caffeine.
She looks at the espresso about to go to waste...
Looks at her pitcher of cold milk...
and quickly mixes them together..adds ice..pours in a bit of vanilla concentrate...
shakes it all together...Voila! Carmen's famous vanilla frappucino.
But it came at a price.
see that she's not as fresh or excited as before the battle...but her wits conquered the machine. Or at least compromised with it.

"Vesuvius": my espresso machine experience

Today, my mom brought home an ESPRESSO MACHINE from my grandma's closet. (Not as cool or big as the one in the pic) Grandma could never get it to work right, but thought that since I worked as a barista for a while, i'd be able to get the hang of it. So i decided to try it out this evening...I was so excited, dreaming up new cappuccino recipies and wondering whether or not it was possible to have a "coffee duel" between here and Tasmania. Anyhow, i started it up, and was trying to clean it out...I actually did look at the instructions, and i don't usually do that. So, I put the water in, tightened up the lid, and turned on the steam. It wasn't quite working, so I took off a few of the parts from the frother and cleaned those out, then put them back on, and stood back, waiting for the steam cycle to go through. Good thing i stood back. It EXPLODED!!! it sounded like a freakin' GUNSHOT. I might have screamed. But i'm not telling. Mom ran out of the bedroom and saw me laughing and hyperventilating at the same time. Once she saw i was okay, she went back to bed, telling me to leave that thing alone. Well, I examined the damage....only the cap from the water reservoir had blown off...but it had spewed this AWFUL slimy stuff...all over the kitchen ceiling. Glad mom wasn't there for that...she would not have liked the word i said. Actually, on second thought, she'd probably have said something even better. At any rate, i cleaned the brown slime off the kitchen ceiling. Now i know why grandma couldn't get it to work. But at least it's really clean now...if i can ever get up the courage to use it again...golly!

Hi ho, hi ho, off to work I go

Yesterday was my first day of "work" at my father's office. He was generous enough to offer me a "job" volunteering with him and his partner. Since he's a physician and i want to be one too, it's a good opportunity to learn a few things and get a reference or two. And since i'm doing this instead of getting a real job, he's promised to help me out a little more. So that's cool. But somehow yesterday, I got stuck up at the front. Filing. And doing paperwork. That would have been okay...but for 5 hours... i continued to file and pull charts and put them back. Dad got some really exciting stuff...a little skin surgery, a patient that had to be rushed to the hospital...and i was stuck up front, filing away his notes. I found myself falling asleep...it's brainless work, which drives me absolutely beserk. Now i know why i want to be a doctor...so i don't have to file charts all day. Then the lady working at the front desk talks to herself. All the time. I kept thinking she was talking to me. But she never responded when i said "pardon?". I thought i'd go crazy. What do you do to keep yourself sane at work?

Thoughts

This is my littlest brother, Austin. I got to spend a lot of time with him last week as my parents were in D.C. with the rest of the young'ns.

Isn't he cute? He's 6 and in 1st grade. I was 13 when he was born, and he's one of the bigger reasons I stayed in Savannah for university.

Before school started, I decided to take one last escapade...I told everyone I was heading north, but ended up in Raleigh, North Carolina to visit my Uncle Brian and Aunt Pam. Pics here!

And school has started back. (Yes, stine, I will try to have fun, and not just do school). Any suggestions on what to do to keep myself from being completely absorbed in studies? Perhaps I'll start blogging more. As soon as I think of something more interesting to write about...

Oooh, more pictures

Check out some of the last ones from Greece.

Housekeeping

What to do? No more job, no school just yet, and I live at home...with a mother who has 6 kids. So, I've been put to work. I've helped redo the bathroom, clean out the air vents, and wash the windows (new appreciation for you, Mike!)but my biggest project was cleaning and re-organizing (or just organizing to start with) my room. I really don't enjoy housework kind of things, I usually just end up sneezing my brains out from all the dust that collects in the far corners of our house. So to keep myself from really losing it, I had to keep myself in prayer as I cleaned, and look for spiritual meanings as I dusted the cobwebs off the upstairs ceiling.
I thought of my own life, and how much I need to be cleansed of my sin and my self.
"Wash away all my iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin." Ps. 51:2
"Create in me a clean heart, Oh God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me." Ps. 51:10
And how wonderful that He, through His love and mercy, chooses to hear our cries and respond to us when we desperately need Him. I remembered the time he healed the leper.
"Jesus reached out his hand and touched the man. 'I am willing' he said. 'Be clean!' Immediately he was cured of his leprosy." Matt. 8:2
My room really looks great now (if i do say so myself!). It took about 4 days of throwing away, reorganizing, vacuuming, and dusting, but now it is a new functional space that has a new, brighter, more interesting look that better serves my needs.
"How much more, then, will the blood of Christ, who through the eternal Spirit offered himself unblemished to God, cleanse our conciences from acts that lead to death, so that we may serve the living God!" Heb. 9:14

Sleepless Nights...

It's 8 in the evening, and I have just recently awakened. Last night was my last official activity as part-time youth intern for the summer at our church...and it's been a stressful job! We "pulled an all-nighter" last night, going to movies, bowling, playing games at the church, and heading to the beach for sunrise. I love those kids!
But I wish that was all there is to it. Certainly, I enjoy the ministry to the young ladies in our youth group. Yet I increasingly find myself less and less satisfied with my church as it applies to my personal growth. It is quite a conundrum...
what does one do when they feel they are not allowed to think outside the box, when they become afraid to share their ideas for ministry because of past criticism? When the Bible studies for one's age group seem non-prepared and on occasion, watered down? When one would like to bring up questions of theology and explore new ideas, but is reprimanded for "doubting"?
And yet one still feels they are needed.
Where does one draw the line?

Travel Songs

It's good to be home. All this longing and pining to be away, only to find myself at peace when I return here to home. Perhaps that's one of the lessons I've learned...to be at peace where I am, Thessaloniki or Savannah. I also learned to cherish my CD player. All those kids with their iPods don't know what they're missing. I'll stay old school until I can afford one. But several songs were very special to me as I travelled home for 32 hours straight. Perhaps you've heard them before. Appreciate the words that spoke my hearts deepest thoughts.

Long, Long Journey
by Enya

City lights shine on the harbour,
Night has fallen down,
Through the darkness
And the shadowI will still go on.

Long, long journey
Through the darkness,
Long, long way to go;
But what are miles
Across the ocean
To the heart that's coming home?

Where the road
Runs through the valley,
Where the river flows,
I will follow every highway
To the place I know.

Long, long journey
Through the darkness,
Long, long way to go;
But what are miles
Across the ocean
To the heart that's coming home?
Long, long journey
Out of nowhere
Long, long way to go
But what are sighs
And what is sadness
To the heart that's coming home?

Fix You
by Coldplay

When you try your best, but you don't succeed
When you get what you want, but not what you need
When you feel so tired, but you can't sleep
Stuck in reverse

When the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can't replace
When you love someone, but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

High up above or down below
When you're too in love to let it go
If you never try you'll never know
Just what you're worth

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

Tears stream down your face
When you lose something you cannot replace
Tears stream down your face
And I...
Tears stream down on your face
I promise you I will learn from the mistakes
Tears stream down your face
And I...
Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

So many emotions overtake the traveller who knows that they have changed so much, experienced so much...and wonder if home is ready for them to come back. I would stay if things were different. If my family and friends could come visit. If things hadn't happened the way they had for the past week to make me yearn so hard for home. I must leave my sadness behind. I'm going home. I have learned of love and abandonment, not romantically, but in a friendship. And I have cried, but I will learn from my choices and hers. And lights have guided me home.